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This reader who struggles with lesbianism raises
some extremely important questions about the impact of our sins upon
our relationship with Jesus. The following is Part 3 of her
email exchange with Chuck Snyder as she asks for help in her
struggle to avoid what she knows is a sin. Click here to read her
first letter to Chuck, Is This a Birth Defect?
or her second letter, What if I Keep Sinning?
Dear
Chuck,
Thank you so much for your response. I find comfort in talking to
you.
I
came to know Christ on June 7 a few years ago. I still remember the
date very clearly because that night I experienced something I have
never experienced before in my life. Subsequently, I learned that it
was the touch of the Holy Spirit, and I was full of confidence and
faith. My heart was opened (spiritually) and I was so willing to
call Jesus "My Lord" and believe that He died for all my
sins. I felt so grateful that He saved me out of the pit of death. I
made a promise to myself that I want to live a spirit-filled life,
righteous and free from sin.
I
claimed the promise of 2 Corinthians 5:18, "Therefore, if
anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new
has come." I was so thrilled to learn about this and I told
myself that I would never engage in lesbianism again. I hated those
old days. Now I have the strength and power, through Jesus Christ
surely, to deter all thoughts and temptations whenever they appear.
Since
the day I accepted Christ, I have been tempted by four different
women. Each time I would confess my temptation and repent, asking
Him to give me strength to overcome. That worked for the first three
women, but eventually I did succumb to temptation with the fourth.
The worst part is that she is someone I introduced to Christ. She
accepted Jesus last year.
Now
both of us are in a dilemma. We have stopped our act for right now.
In
the past I have been rather zealous for the word of God,
evangelizing a great deal through e-mail. I felt the power of the
Holy Spirit helping me with all God's words as I evangelized. But
now, my zeal to evangelize has totally evaporated into thin air. I
do not even feel like attending church. I know I need help.
Thank
you, Chuck, for your responses so far. May our Great Lord continue
to bless you with wisdom.
Your
grieving Sister-in-Christ
Chuck's
Response
Thanks
for getting back to me. I wonder if you are trying to be perfect?
Sanctification is a PROCESS -- salvation is an event. As hard as we
try, once in awhile in a vulnerable moment, Satan wins the battle.
We grieve, but we need to quickly ask God's forgiveness, and then
guess what, he does. HE FORGETS OUR SINS. Here are some scriptures
that talk about this.
"He
has removed our sins as far away from us as the east is from the
west." Psalms 103:12 (Living)
North
and South meet at some point. If you go North for awhile, eventually
you will begin to go South because of our round earth. However, if
you go East you'll ALWAYS be going East. Or if you go West, you'll
ALWAYS be going West. The two will never meet.
"Repent
ye therefore, and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out,
when the times of refreshing shall come from the presence of the
Lord." Acts 3:19 (KJV).
"For
God was in Christ, restoring the world to himself, no longer
counting men's sins against them but blotting them out. This is the
wonderful message he has given us to tell others." 2 Cor 5:19
(Living). You're probably too young to remember blotters, but we
used to use pen and ink in school. We would blot the ink to keep it
from smearing, because it dried slowly. However if you blotted it
too quickly, you took all the ink away. God's "blotter"
erased all of our sins.
"And
I will be merciful to them in their wrongdoing, and I will remember
their sins no more." Heb 8:12 (Living). I take God at His Word
when the Bible says He will never remember our sins anymore they are
forever out of His memory. What a gift that is.
"It
was good for me to go through all of this bitterness. You have
delivered me from death, and have put all of my sins behind Your
back" Isaiah 38:17. I love the picture of God reaching around
and putting my sins behind His back where He can't get at them. God
forgives our mistakes, so we can forgive others for their mistakes
as well, and help them go on.
Now
does that mean we can just sin knowing we can ask forgiveness? Of
course not. We have to make every effort we can to run from
temptation, and to make sure we don't put ourselves into the
position to fall. We do this, not because God might punish us, but
because of the awesome gratitude we have for God choosing us and
protecting us and preparing an unspeakable future with Him in
heaven. So you failed, now ask God's forgiveness with a broken heart
and take steps not to be in vulnerable situations. And, of
course, Satan, the accuser, will come along to remind you of your
failures, but tell him, "Buzz off, you slimy old serpent!"
You are pure and perfect in God's sight.
- Chuck
Snyder
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